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The Art of "Selfishness"

6/29/2015

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This concept was written about in a 30's publication by David Seabury.

It discusses the importance of putting your wants, needs, and desires first (as opposed to pleasing others) in order to live a happy and fulfilling life.

Sort of like the emergency procedure on airplanes "in the event of a loss of cabin pressure... please secure your own mask before attempting to help others."  This is basically saying to get your affairs in order before you begin to get involved with others.  If one is a constant "people pleaser" and putting others needs before their own, the individual is liable to find themselves depressed and exhausted.  People have an uncanny ability to drain energy from others without feeling remorse or appreciation.  Humans are conditioned to please others from an early age until they are mature enough to stand their ground and establish boundaries.  Sometimes this maturity is under developed and can leave an individual feeling victimized and taken advantage of.  This learned helplessness can be seen with those begging for spare change on the street.  It seems that there will never be enough "change" in the world to satisfy their need.  I'm not suggesting one adopt a callous attitude towards the less fortunate, I'm simply stating that if one is rewarded for simply needing help, then what is their incentive to emancipate themselves from their situation?  In most cases poor mental health, substance addiction, and depression are to blame for such circumstances.

The Aristotelian argument that there is no such thing as altruism also comes to mind.  The ancient philosopher claimed altruistic behavior was motivated from self concern.  Begging serves the donor as well as the supplicant.  The donor is able to positively contribute against their balance of 'karmic' debt; whereas, the supplicant is rewarded for their humility in begging.

Philosophical arguments aside, when people are constantly giving away their time, wealth, power, or energy... they are liable to find themselves bankrupt in each of those categories.

Learning to say "No" when one has been conditioned to please others is easier said than done.  The simple notion of asking oneself if they truly wish to give of themselves is somehow labeled as "selfish" with negative connotations.  Ironically people are also master manipulators, a trait we've been cultivating since birth.  Crying for attention is a form of manipulation especially when the tears are insincere.  A parent who rushes to attend the needs of a crying child teaches that the child simply has to whine/cry in order to receive attention.  When parents eventually learn to "let the child cry" and distinguish between genuine and insincere tears, then the child learns that their cries may not always be sufficient to garner the expected response and a new coping strategy is developed (usually one that allows the parents to rest).

When one finally learns to establish boundaries and stick to them, they have effectively earned their freedom.  It is a statement of what is or isn't acceptable in dealing with one another.  Those repeat offenders who don't seem to understand these boundaries are free to move on to another source of energy to feed off.  Suddenly, the empowered individual has held their ground and isn't a slave to catering to the bully.  This provides a positive feedback loop of confidence and guiltless conscience to the 'giver' who has preserved their integrity by not committing to cheapening their energy with undesirable tasks.

If one does not learn to master their ability to set meaningful boundaries, then they are vulnerable to being enslaved by their own weakness to deal with "energy vampires".

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Flat to Phat

6/27/2015

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Metzeler 880's 210mm (7070miles)
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Michelin Cmdr II 240mm

The smell of burning rubber always makes me a little nervous while riding.  I've changed flat tires on a car many times.  A flat tire on a bike is a completely different story.  When you ride, there are basic safety checks one learns to take before heading out on the road and tire pressure is one of them.

After pulling into Dallas from my 200 mile ride, I noticed the center of the tire had worn down to the steel belt.  I remember smelling burnt tire while aggressively accelerating to get on the highway in Waco, TX.  The previous owner had only 3400 miles of tire wear on the bike in 3 years until I put another 3400 miles in 3 months.  These tires were being truly ridden for the first time and needed attention.

When I called a few dealerships to inquire about the replacement costs, I was quoted high prices and long wait times (no surprises there).  I decided to call a few local Motorcycle Gear shops and ask for mechanic referrals.  I was referred to a mobile tire (all service) mechanic who was polite, less expensive, and showed up the next day before noon.  I was amazed at how professional he was.  I learned how to work on my bike and gained new insight into the passion of riding motorcycles.
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Cogito Ergo Sum

6/26/2015

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Muhammad Ali (Cassius Clay) age 12. (Getty Images)
I think therefore I AM. (René Descartes)

The Ego and Self Esteem are two concepts related to one another but differ like siblings.  Ego often precedes one's self esteem, but once knowledge is attained, then esteem is built.

The Ego is a concept often used, but rarely understood.  Sigmund Freud defined it as one of the 3 components to the human psyche.  It is concerned with balancing desire with practicality (between the id and superego).  It's been said that it is a measure of how a person thinks or feels about themselves at any given time including how they are perceived by others.

Self Esteem deals with the self respect derived from personal accomplishment and the corresponding knowledge or confidence in oneself.

When one has not attempted a feat, but feels that they are capable of such a task, it is their ego that tells them they can "do it".  When they struggle or fail, their character is tested and how they react to the reality of frustration helps build maturity.  Their ability to shrug off disappointment and persist in moving forward is the measure of that persons character.

It is also important to note that ego derives fulfillment from external sources such as fashion, wealth, societal status, and addiction to material; whereas self esteem is fulfilled from internal sources such as achieving self knowledge, personal accomplishment, and faith in one's honest ability (true confidence).

Ego tends to be ephemeral and temporary (like renting).  People who define themselves by these things find themselves lost when such ego devices (inevitably) encounter loss such as: wealth, relationships, business, sport or physical attributes (such as your body).

Self esteem seems to be enduring and much more lasting (like owning).  People who possess self esteem retain their value when material or superficial relationships are severed.

When given a choice between the two, I would much rather elect the option that offers the most mileage.   My happiness will ultimately be greater in the long run and independent of external stimulus.

I have heard it said, "Fake it till you make it" which I believe refers to the mercurial state of one's character.  Few people are born 'winners', it takes practice at building any skill; therefore, before one can be great at something, they first have to believe that they can achieve greatness.  Many times, in order to convince themselves, people must first be convincing to others.  Eventually the individual will forget, forgive, or forgo their past selves, and embrace their new persona.

A few years back, I decided to grow out my hair.  I had always known short hair and spent a great deal of time and money to fit my idea of style and fashion.  When I first started the growth phase, I had no expectations since it was completely new.  I noticed that people looked at me differently when I didn't conform to societal standards.  After a year, I stopped caring about styling my looks and just 'went with the flow'; women started to notice.  I learned many things from the process including the fact that confidence comes from within.  After a few years of possessing long hair, I decided to shave my locks completely off.  Almost drastically, I felt as if my powers of confidence had left me.  It was traumatic adjusting to the new reflection in the mirror. After a couple days, I realized that I was the same Man, just without the extravagant mane of hair.  My confidence returned, and once again... Women noticed.  It's a cool experiment to try out (if you can afford it).  This tests as well as develops character and goes with the philosophy of knowing thyself.

Greatness is a mindset that begins with the belief, "I think therefore I am."

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Sexual Politics

6/21/2015

 
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Disney. "The Lion King" (1994)
Politics are concerned with voting.

People vote with their ballots: time, attention, money, and sex.

It's basically a world full of individuals campaigning to earn business, to teach, to preach, to solicit romance, and to influence others.  Each individual has evolved their own style of campaign to accomplish their goal.  Some are aggressive, others are passive, and some adapt their strategy to each situation.  Either way, in a social environment, politics are the way we interact with one another (as opposed to one's lack of political concern on a deserted island).

In the animal kingdom there exists a social pecking order, or status.  This status governs the responsibilities of each member of the animal community.  This animal 'caste' system has often been described by anthropologists using Greek letters to establish the following order: Alpha, Beta, Gamma, Sigma, and Omega (with the likelihood of many more).  The characteristics that describe each Greek letter in alphabetic pack order tend to differ slightly from each observer's perspective; however, using the voting statistics determined by social interactions one is able to draw their own political conclusions...

Alpha class individuals are generally favored to lead based upon perceived genetic traits that favor dominance and power, such as height, size, intellect, and physical strength.  They are the recognized 'best', or champions of the pack.  In the animal kingdom, the Alphas earn the privilege of mate choice selection.  In other words, because of their perceived genetic advantages within their environment, they can pretty much mate with whomever they desire.  Animals instinctively breed with those that will favor their offspring's gene pool with traits that will benefit future progeny (Classic Darwinism).

Beta class individuals equally possess many or all of the favored genetic traits; however, they do not seem as concerned with leadership as their Alpha counterparts; instead choosing to pursue a path less fraught with competition.  They still command a healthy selection of mate choices without the burden of battling for dominance and leadership of the pack.  Their selection of mating options, while still great, are fewer in comparison to those of the Alpha.

The characteristics that surround Gamma, Sigma, and any other class (with the exception of Omega) are more loosely defined and subject to discord among the scientific community.  Basically, these classes do not fit into Alpha, Beta, or Omega categories, but still hold enough distinction to have their ranks.  Mate selection preferences are difficult to determine as there are many nebulous factors that contribute to these individuals class designation.

The Omega class (the last letter in the Greek alphabet) are composed of the lowest order of individuals in a social grouping.  These beings do not possess the commonly desired attributes for genetic propagation within a given environment.  They are often outcasts that occupy the lowest rung on the social ladder.  Their mate selection is often limited and restricted to their own kind.

It appears that the politics of caste discrimination are biologically rooted in our animal evolution.  In other words, our species is competing within itself for the genetic evolution of the strongest, fittest, and most dominant genes (within a given environment).  We reward these traits with continued support by our 'vote' as counted by where we give our time, attention, money, and sex.

Animals are able to mimic those belonging to another social class for the benefit of social gain; however, the constant charade must be extremely convincing in order to fool the social constituency (in humans we call them politicians).  If the 'act' is found fraudulent, then the social masses usher the charlatan to their deserving classification.  Many individuals choose this path in order to improve their circumstance (which is understandable), but at the expense of polluting the genetic pool with their fraudulent genes.  This can be likened to an individual who masks their true appearance with deceptions about their character or through physical alterations such as plastic surgery.  While upon initial observation these individuals may fool a prospective mate, their true nature will eventually out itself as seen by passing on their 'flawed' DNA to successive offspring.

I guess the bottom line here is that as humans we must accept that we are political creatures and not immune from the harsh reality that is our ingrained discrimination.  When we accept our nature, we can then seek to improve our collective circumstance by using our abundant intellect to override our baser instinct to judge others and focus on a win/win solution for brothers and sisters of all classes.  It is important to understand that these caste borders are an imaginary construct to which we allow ourselves to be bound.

Unlike other animals, we possess the free will to change our circumstance at any time.  We can seek an education that will sharpen our minds or travel to experience culture and perspective.  We can make conscious decisions to better ourselves such as diet and exercise.  We possess the power to connect spiritually with one another through the bonds of Love.  In these ways (mind, body, and spirit), we can rise above our imprisonment of social classification.

In order to steer the evolution of human beings, it is clear that it will require the leadership of Alpha individuals, who are naturally selected by virtue of sexual politics.  Their participation will be necessary to provide protection, guidance, and compassion to those tragically bound to the state of hopelessness.  Like a Lion watching over his pride, or a shepherd looking after his sheep.

Racial Purity

6/17/2015

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Yates, David. "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2" (2011)
Often described as racial hygiene, the concept of racial purity deals with forbidding the blood lines from one race, ethnic group, or culture to reproduce children with any other.  A sort of 'perverse quality control' on the production of human life invented by conservative idealists and propagated by blind irrationalism or willful ignorance.

I was first introduced to the word "miscegenation" during my senior year in high school while reading Faulkner.  It refers to the mixing of races.  I read through the novel with the fervor of a student expecting to graduate from an all boys preparatory school and attend a co-ed university in less than a yr.  I comprehended the bare minimum.

Being the son of immigrant parents, I didn't realize the gravity of racial sexual selection until it was time to marry and settle down.  Growing up in a country touted as a 'melting pot' of diverse cultural constituents founded upon the principles of fairness, equality, religious freedom, and the pursuit of happiness; I earnestly believed in this ideal (I still do for the record).

During my first year at university, I dated a beautiful young woman of mixed Asian/American heritage.  We related to one another through our cultural similarities.  We both had parents that spoke English with accents.  We both enjoyed cultural foods.  And most importantly, we both enjoyed playing Nintendo Mario Kart.  We were incredibly young, but still discussed the possibility of having children someday.  The thought of mixed race children was exciting and not really something that bothered either one of us.  Having been born and raised in a country where most of my female prospects were a different race, I didn't have much choice than to be comfortable with the idea of miscegenation (why would anyone choose to limit themselves?).

For whatever reasons, this relationship was not 'to be' and much personal growth was gained on both sides (it's how we mature).  Looking back, it's funny how people of culture tend to gravitate to one another socially.  I observe this phenomena still to this day.

My attraction to culture led me to date all kinds of women which helped me to learn more about myself and the world.  I discovered that prejudice doesn't just come from ignorant bigotry, but also from educated ethnic indoctrination.  I had always witnessed irrational hatred for other races, religions, and gender orientations growing up in Texas.  The degree of xenophobia ranged from careless jokes and stereotypes to hurtful intentions and physical aggression.  However, one of the most pernicious forms of racism struck me when I encountered the concept of racial purity and that my perceived "impure" blood line should not be mixed with someone of 'pure' breeding (Basically the subplot of the Harry Potter Novels).

Psychology teaches us that children learn to display discriminatory behavior from their environment, and that they are not born with intrinsic hatred toward any people.  In other words, hate is a learned behavior.  The poisoning of minds begins at home and if supported by the community is allowed to thrive and develop into concrete belief like a virus consuming its host.  The reason this strain of bigotry is particularly damaging is because its indoctrination is premeditated and long before the host can break free from its grasp, they have to fight against friends, family, and a community that has embedded itself into the identity of the individual (I don't know many people who have the strength to fight this).

I wish I could write that there is a cure for all forms of bigotry, but all one can do is to live your life by example and base your policy on being truthful to your beliefs.  It was said that "Truly unless you change and become like little children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven", which I have interpreted as the return to innocence like the un-poisoned minds of children at play with one another regardless of race, religion, orientation, and wealth.  At any rate, if one subscribes to the concept of heaven, I'm pretty sure ALL are welcome.
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